Ask Dr. Joannie Questions

Question: My grandson is 10. He used to love spending the night with my husband and I, and he would beg to stay longer. However, this weekend I told him I was going to volunteer in his class, and he said “don’t embarrass me.” I asked what that meant, and he said “act like you don’t […]

Question: My firstborn grandson is 3 1/2 years old. It seems it’s in the nature of most males to be wired for confrontation and “combat.” I’d like to teach my grandson to first avoid fighting and violence, but if there is no other choice, then to be able to defend himself. Do you think it’s

Question: My grandson graduated from college in 2020 and has been unable to find work. To me, it looks like he has just given up and doesn’t seem to be motivated to look for work. He is living with his parents (my daughter and son-in-law) and we are all concerned about him. How can we

Question: We have a situation in our family where the other set of grandparents is jealous of us. They live nearby our son and his family whereas we live 4 hours away. When we come for a visit, I feel we have to sneak in. If they know we are around, they make it very

Question: My daughter-in-law recently died of cancer and my husband and I are providing before and after school childcare for our 4 grandchildren. All of them are grieving the loss of their mother, each in different ways because they are ages 4-15. How can we honor the memory of their mother, help them cope with

Question: At my grandson’s high school, three of his classmates committed suicide this year. He is confused and upset and when he comes over to help me with yard work every weekend, he tells me he can’t sleep and cries when he is alone at night. He keeps asking me for advice but I have

Question: What is the best way to address some poor behavior I’ve seen in my grandchildren, with my daughter and son-in-law? Response: It is best to mention what you have observed rather than what you suspect. For example, rather than saying, “I think Alicia is a bully” it would be better to say that you

Question: I was very close with my three granddaughters until each one of them reached about 11 years of age. At that point, I noticed that they didn’t seem to want to be around me anymore or come visit my husband and I in the summer. What are some ways to engage with preteens and

Question: My preteen granddaughter told me she has asked her Mom (my daughter) to take her to church several times. Mom says “ok” but never gets up in time to go. My heart breaks when my granddaughter tells me this. When she is with me, we always go to my church and she says she

Question: How do we as parents and grandparents navigate very “liberal” views on same-sex attraction and LGBTQ issues with our grown children and grandkids? Response: The first thing that is most helpful is to ask questions. Find out what and why they believe what they do. If their perspective is based on their opinions about